Personal Journey With God

By Jamie Kang
Hope KL English

Being brought up in a typical Chinese family, I was always told that you need to work hard to earn every penny because there's nothing free in this world. Hence, when the gospel was shared to me, it was foreign to me. And even after I have accepted Christ, to fully believe that salvation is by grace and not by works, it's really difficult for me.

As the years went by, I had constantly been in a rat race with my financial situation because I sought to fix the problems with my own strength instead of depending on God. 

During COVID-19 pandemic, my financial situation took a deep dive. My brother had a major car accident a month before the lockdown. His car, which was under my name, was a total loss and he was jobless for months during MCO. I was the only one paying all the bills. And this difficult situation affects me even until recent years as my debts were piling.

February this year, my financial situation took another deep dive. My faith was seriously shaken. I was asked to pay back the NCD benefits that were given to me last year due to a car accident and I lost my wallet with the money in it. I was also required to pay the penalty for losing my MyKad. That very same week, my dog got ill and needed to see the vet while my car needed  major repairs. All these sums to a huge amount of money which I couldn't afford. I was on the verge of breaking down. 

'God always shows up at our weakest'. 

At that moment, I didn't know what to do, I shared with a Taiwan friend I met online with an intention to vent, because I know no one whom you met online would offer actual physical help. But this friend surprised me when he transferred more than sufficient money to help me settle my debt with no strings attached.

All glory be to God. 

God is my provider, and He provides exactly what I needed even before I asked. 

In the beginning of April, I received an amount of RM1,152 from my income tax refunds. And as strange as it sounds, at the very end of April, my car required another few repairs which sums up to RM1,152.

Yes, some would argue, if God loves you, why did you need to repair your car, again? But I know if God didn't love me, He wouldn't have provided the exact amount of money even before I knew I needed it. 

God also spoke to me through bible verses either a few days or sometimes hours before I knew I needed those words to speak to someone or even to myself.

I accepted Christ 16 years ago in this church and honestly, the walk as a believer was not a bed of roses. Throughout these years, I have lost a lot, but I have also gained so much. 

I'm thankful to the one who brought me to this church and shepherded me when I was still a new believer. The beautiful thing about this church is the shepherding system. I remember when I was rebellious, my shepherd, Kim, never gave up on me, faithfully writing letters and reaching out to me. I really appreciate Kim for everything she has done. 

I am also grateful for Pastor Lai Eng who interviewed and accepted my application as a member of Hope Church, allowing me to grow in this church. 

Here I would like to encourage everyone that when the situation is tough, don't give up. You may be on the verge of a breakthrough because of the seed you have sowed, and the prayer you have made many years ago. Trust in God and wait, because you are actually staring at your answered prayers, it's just not fully formed yet. Just like a seed you sowed, it's not fully formed yet. When the time comes and as you continue to work on it, it will flourish. And God is faithful, when I learn to submit the little I have, He used it to make miracles. 

Today I praise God that I am addicted to His word, and I'm addicted to sharing the good news because of the amazing things He has done. Because each day when I do that, I sow the seed to at least one person's life. 

I am here today because someone sowed the seed into my life 16 years ago and didn't give up on me. I am here today because I clung onto God when the situation gets tough and I was too weak to face the storm on my own. 

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.'

2 Corinthians 12:9